Spring Cleaning

Something that inevitably needs to be done every year...especially with having a kid - going through the toys. Except this year is a bit different, she's not here and I haven't gone through any of her stuff since moving into the apartment. I finally decided that its time to go through her toys today...I got some hooks the other day at Wal-Mart to hang her toy net, so I can get them out of the huge bin and get the bin out of her room, I also got some screws for the toy shelf...but the ones I got are too big. I went to toss the toys in the toy net and got to the bottom of the bin, only to find the sheet that was draped across the stairs the morning I found that he'd taken off with her I'm not sure how much longer I can take her not being here with me. If I were to just end it all today, it would take a few days to notice that I'm not alive anymore...I live alone. It's not like when he took off with her that I was there to notice they were gone. I just want this hurt and pain to go away...I'm done with it.