****Warning this is not your "typical" happy post...I'm bluntly honest in my post of how I'm feeling...If you don't like it, don't read it****
Well, we're only on Wednesday and it's definitely turning out to be one of "those" weeks. I got about three hours of sleep last night...I don't remember falling asleep last night....not that I ever remember falling asleep. Though the three hours of sleep won't effect me either...for me that's "normal" I don't usually get a lot of sleep, I either get around three hours of sleep or I'll get 12 or more hours of sleep (days I can't seem to get enough sleep).
Right now I can honestly say, I'm thankful for the coping skills that my therapist that I had when I lived down south. Though lately implementing those skills have been hard...especially lately when I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to face the world, I don't want to "do" anything but crawl into a hole somewhere and be left alone. I try talking to my husband...doesn't help. I try using rubber bands and snapping them on my wrist (instead of cutting)...doesn't help (still want to). I'm down to journaling and just occupying my time with other things. I'm hoping that I can just occupy my time and mind enough to keep from going crazy.
I wish I knew what it's like to feel "normal"...but I don't think I ever will.
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