These last few days have felt like a train wreck. My emotions are going one direction one moment and then the next they're wanting to go a completely different direction. I'm not sure what to do. I know I should give the medication more time...I'm hoping in time it also helps with this odd "need" to cut every time my stress level and emotions feel "out of control" or I start feeling disconnected...which has been more often then not as of late. It's weird. When Bug tells me that she loves me and/or gives me a hug and kiss, I should "feel" something. I autonomically respond, "I love you too." with a hug and a kiss...I pray that she doesn't realize the lack of emotion behind my responses that I give her...I just don't know how to otherwise react. Lately it's as though I "just exist." I don't understand the point of much lately. I want to cry, but can't.
I've got no one...nothing left of this life....
....I'm alone.
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